Monday, April 11

Election Comedy Proposal

Gosh ... just looked back at how many posts there have been in the past few days - I'm posting faster than an anti-philanthropist at Christmas!

Anyway, I have been wondering about having a go at some comedy sketch writing, and I thought I would air the following idea for the general enjoyment of people. Also, if a BBC Producer happened to be passing by and decided to snap up my services with immediate effect, that would be nice ... Although highly unlikely ...

'Election Day' is actually an idea for a sketch involving the Little Britain characters Lou and Andy. (So if Matt Lucas & David Walliams happened to be passing and liked it, then please do get in touch!) For everyone else, if you know the show, please just imagine Lou and Andy's voices as you read the lines ... If you've never seen "Little Britain" before, or don't find it at all funny, then this will probably be completely lost on you!

Little Britain "Election Day" sketch (proposal)

*PLEASE NOTE THAT ANY APPARENT CORRELATION BETWEEN THE POLITICAL PARTIES MENTIONED IN THIS SKETCH AND REAL POLITICAL PARTIES ARE PURELY COINCIDENTAL AND PEOPLE SHOULD NOT INFER NOR BE ENCOURAGED TO CHANGE THEIR VOTE AS A RESULT. THE SKETCH IS DEVISED PURELY FOR THE PURPOSES OF ENTERTAINMENT.*

(Scene opens in a Polling station. Lou & Andy are in the polling booth)

Lou: Well, here we are Andy ... What a kafuffle getting you down here - all thanks to the nice man from the Save the Squirrels party. Time to exercise your democratic right. So who are you going to vote for?

Andy: (whilst not looking, points to a name on the Ballot paper) That one!

Lou: That one?

Andy: Yeah!

Lou: But that's the Independent Britain Party

Andy: Yeah I know

Lou: But I don't think they have any real chance of winning any seats, I think that would be a silly waste of your vote, won't it?

Andy: Yeah I know

Lou: So who's it to be then? What about the Red party, you always liked the Red party ...

Andy: (Again points without looking) That one

Lou: But you don't like the Independent Britain Party. You always said that they represent the lighter shade of respectable middle-class xenophobia.

Andy: Yeah I know

Lou: What about the Yellow party?

Andy: (pointing) That one!

Lou: The blue party?

Andy: (firmly pointing but without looking) I want that one!

Lou: (shaking head in despair) Well it's your vote, Andy. Are you sure?

Andy: (nodding head) Yeah

Lou: 'Cos you know you can't change it once you 've voted?

Andy: Yeah, I want that one! (pointing again)

(They emerge from the booth and Andy places his ballot in the box. They leave the polling station)

Andy: I wanted to vote Monster Raving Loony party!

THE END

(C) Copyright Joe Byrne 2005 (11th April 2005 AD)

And now my brief foray into the world of comedy sketch writing comes to a swift and dramatic close. (I thought it best to end on a high) All that remains to be said is that whilst the characters Lou and Andy remain the intellectual property of those fine gentlemen Mr Matt Lucas and Mr David Walliams, this sketch is my own work, hence the (C)Copyright Joe Byrne 2005 ... and all that!

A very productive day in all, a good meeting at church this morning, a nice lunch, a superb afternoon of Monopoly (in which I scored a rare and stunning victory!) and watching the final episode of "The West Wing" Series 6 - An absolutely stunning piece of television drama filled with gripping suspense, intrigue and some great characterisation and empathy. Brilliant ... but more on that later.

I'm just going to sit by my phone and wait for the BBC to phone begging me to come work for them ... That is, until I realise that my phone mumber is not posted here and go to bed dejected and despondent.

Sunday, April 3

God on God ... and other things!

Well, it's been quite a week! From Easter Monday to Friday I was attending the Church Student Ministries "God on God" conference in Herefordshire. Student groups from evangelical churches in Manchester, London, Birmingham, Exeter, Hull and a few other places came together for 5 days of quality fellowship and Bible teaching.

The past few years I've been to Spring Harvest at this time of year and apart from UCCF's "Word Alive" programme running for one of the weeks I've been pretty disappointed with the quality of the teaching. Much more presentation and entertainment over Bible content it seems. Anyway, I would highly recommend the "God on God" conference for any church student group. Each year we take a Bible doctrine and spend 5 days really getting our teeth into it. This year we were thinking about God's Sovereignty. It was pretty hardcore and intense, but well worth it.

Most of the teaching was done in seminar groups rather than up-front teaching, making for a more interactive & involved learning process as we looked at what pretty much the whole Bible said about God's sovereignty and we were challenged to live in the light of this teaching. We also had Review groups to think a bit more about what we'd learned that day and a small "Scripture-Under-Scrutiny" group that met after breakfast. In the evenings we'd have an "All together time" with singing, testimonies, open prayers and a Bible talk helping us to apply what we'd learned a bit more.

In all there were about 100 of us and it was really encouraging that there was a real sense of fellowship that prevailed between a lot of very different people - it just showed the unity possible in Jesus and his gospel. The food was absolutely fantastic - all proper home-cooked style nosh in vast quantities (including some of the best home-made pizza I've ever had!) A brilliant 5 days and one that allowed the group of us who went from The Plant to get to know each other a bit better!

So, if you go to a church that has a number of students there and want to encourage them to get some good Bible doctrine teaching, send them off to the CSM "God on God" Conference 2006 ... the topic in question will be "The Trinity & Relationships"

Anyways, I'm going to have a few more days off work before term starts next week and The Plant resumes normal term-time meetings! Hopefully I can get some more done towards my songs and the "Open Song Music" project with Crossring (Open Song - A free resource for the church of brand new Biblical hymns and songs of praise!)

Until next time ...