Sunday, October 17

Attack of the ManFlu

"So how's everything with you?" Joe chirped happily into the phone receiver.
It was early Saturday evening and the weekly phone call from the parents was in full progress. It was a good week to report; not a lot had happened but that meant nothing bad had happened and so Joe was in fairly good spirits and this was easily conveyed.

It started up the stairs; it had been lurking in the house for a couple of days and had already claimed one victim. The second victim was perfect prey; currently distracted by a phone call - the inconsequential exchange of news and pleasantries and so caught up in his own present happiness to notice the onset of anything. With no interruptions, it reached the top of the stairs and turned onto the landing, creeping ever closer to the latest victim.

Suddenly another human came bounding out of the room straight ahead ... it ducked in a door way to avoid him. Having not assessed his current health, it was far too dangerous to strike for fear of being repelled. No, it must continue with the original plan.

It crept into the room silently and invisibly, as only a vicious infection can, and observed the victim squatting on the bed, back to the door. Perfect! And for pure irony it attacked at the very moment that the victim was caught in a moment of complete comic ecstasy - caused by some idiotic pun or cheeky remark. It would be a full hour before he felt the first tickle in the throat, two hours before the coughing really got underway and a full day before the latest victim began to feel incredibly rough. It sighed in relief; his evil work here was done - another pathetic human victim of the Evil ManFlu. Now where was that other house mate?


Yes, for the last week, I have been down with the ManFlu - a unique strain present among the student population of Manchester and passed on to those who work with them (like Church Student Workers!) It wasn't great but it wasn't too bad - certainly not as dramatic as the above makes it out to be! Anyway, I'm over it now ... pretty much and this is by way of explaining that there's really no news to report from the last week ... except that I had the ManFlu.

Badgers, beavers, stoats and weasels to the lot of you!

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